What are you doing tonight, my love?
Where will you lay your head down to rest?
I don't know your name, and I can't imagine your face.
The only thing I know is that you'll be the best.
I pray for you, like I hope you're praying for me.
Do you know the Lord now? Or do you still seek His grace?
He's the greatest there is, I promise you that.
He'll enable us both to finish the race.
What're your interests, and what are your passions?
Do you like baseball or basketball? Dancing or singing?
Do you like adventures or safety? Planned or spontaneous?
Will you still love the Cubbies, even when they're not winning?
I pray for your protection, that you'd come to no harm.
I have nothing to fear cause He's got you in His hands.
But I cannot help but wonder, can't help to dream.
Do you agree that Brand New is the greatest band?
Do you like comedies or dramas, maybe a little action is what you crave.
Do you like to travel? Where will you go and where have you been?
Do you surf, do you snowboard, or maybe you ski?
Perhaps you're even someone I now call a friend?
Do you want a family? I hope that you do.
Three kids of four, that'd be my hope.
Do you have all that you need?
How do you live and how do you cope?
I could go on all day, so many questions to ask.
I'll just have to trust and believe God knows.
I'm waiting for you. Please wait for me.
Ok God, we're ready for the show!
Monday, February 23, 2009
Sunday, February 15, 2009
One Last Thought of You (Feb 15, 2009)
It's been awhile now, 53 days to be exact.
My heart continues to torment me.
Why it's so difficult I may never know, thought it'd be quick.
Yet I've seen that this was harder than I thought it would be.
It's time to make a choice, and I've made my own.
I need to get over this, I need to move on.
You'd think that after all that happened,
I would have realized you were gone.
I wanted to believe, I guess I wanted to hope.
But you've shown there is nothing else there.
No little hints, not the smallest of signs.
You are who you are, I'll try not to care.
I hope you know, I don't blame you at all.
You made a decision, and where right in your choice.
I'm not angry or bitter, I'd like to still be friends.
But understand if I never again hear your voice.
This is the last you'll hear, nothing more in your honor.
I am living for Jesus now, there is no rewind.
I will always be praying for you and your life.
Know that you will never be totally out of my mind.
Goodbye.
My heart continues to torment me.
Why it's so difficult I may never know, thought it'd be quick.
Yet I've seen that this was harder than I thought it would be.
It's time to make a choice, and I've made my own.
I need to get over this, I need to move on.
You'd think that after all that happened,
I would have realized you were gone.
I wanted to believe, I guess I wanted to hope.
But you've shown there is nothing else there.
No little hints, not the smallest of signs.
You are who you are, I'll try not to care.
I hope you know, I don't blame you at all.
You made a decision, and where right in your choice.
I'm not angry or bitter, I'd like to still be friends.
But understand if I never again hear your voice.
This is the last you'll hear, nothing more in your honor.
I am living for Jesus now, there is no rewind.
I will always be praying for you and your life.
Know that you will never be totally out of my mind.
Goodbye.
We Could Have; But We Didn't (Jan 1, 2009)
I could have spent Christmas without tears.
I could have spent the New Year full of joy.
I could have went to bed each night content.
I could have, but I didn't.
I could have just gone home that night.
I could have hid my feelings like normal.
I could have continued to be happy.
I could have, but I didn't.
He could have left the blind men blind.
He could have left the sick, sick.
He could have condemned us from the start.
He could have, but He didn't.
He could have called angels from Heaven.
He could have saved himself that night.
He could have conquered an empire.
He could have, but He didn't.
He could have decided not to become human.
I could have gone at a safer pace.
I could have held back the way I felt.
He could have never given His grace.
I could have done things differently.
He could have left our sins, but not He.
He could have said no to the cross.
I could have listened to those around me.
We could have, but We didn't.
I could have spent the New Year full of joy.
I could have went to bed each night content.
I could have, but I didn't.
I could have just gone home that night.
I could have hid my feelings like normal.
I could have continued to be happy.
I could have, but I didn't.
He could have left the blind men blind.
He could have left the sick, sick.
He could have condemned us from the start.
He could have, but He didn't.
He could have called angels from Heaven.
He could have saved himself that night.
He could have conquered an empire.
He could have, but He didn't.
He could have decided not to become human.
I could have gone at a safer pace.
I could have held back the way I felt.
He could have never given His grace.
I could have done things differently.
He could have left our sins, but not He.
He could have said no to the cross.
I could have listened to those around me.
We could have, but We didn't.
Take My Hand - Let's Go On A Journey (Dec 11, 2008)
The clouds were blowing in, the sky began to darken.
The sun faded, then disappeared as it was hidden away.
Night and day I prayed, prayed to see the light again.
Each prayer lessened the hope of seeing your shinning ray.
I didn't understand yet I waited. I prayed. I hoped. I believed.
Like a clear May afternoon, you opened up my skies.
Your light shined once more, warming everything it touched. Me.
My hope, fully restored. I continue toward the prize.
You don't understand. Neither do I fully. But I believe.
I believe in the power of Him, I believe in His plan.
Together, side by side. Hand in Hand. Cheek to cheek.
Do you feel what I feel? Do you believe we can?
Trust that was vacant, has found a place in my heart.
Hope that'd been removed, returned once again.
Peace I never felt, now overwhelms my being.
Love was destroyed, could it reappear in the end?
Only He knows the future, only He knows the end.
It's not for us to worry, not for us to fear.
Join me now, follow me dearest, as we give in to His will.
He'll take away our doubt, and remove every tear.
How could I doubt your love? It has never failed me.
Turn my eyes Father, Turn my eyes to the Lamb.
Shine your light on me. Radiate yourself within me.
Help me Jesus. Help me to be that man.
The sun faded, then disappeared as it was hidden away.
Night and day I prayed, prayed to see the light again.
Each prayer lessened the hope of seeing your shinning ray.
I didn't understand yet I waited. I prayed. I hoped. I believed.
Like a clear May afternoon, you opened up my skies.
Your light shined once more, warming everything it touched. Me.
My hope, fully restored. I continue toward the prize.
You don't understand. Neither do I fully. But I believe.
I believe in the power of Him, I believe in His plan.
Together, side by side. Hand in Hand. Cheek to cheek.
Do you feel what I feel? Do you believe we can?
Trust that was vacant, has found a place in my heart.
Hope that'd been removed, returned once again.
Peace I never felt, now overwhelms my being.
Love was destroyed, could it reappear in the end?
Only He knows the future, only He knows the end.
It's not for us to worry, not for us to fear.
Join me now, follow me dearest, as we give in to His will.
He'll take away our doubt, and remove every tear.
How could I doubt your love? It has never failed me.
Turn my eyes Father, Turn my eyes to the Lamb.
Shine your light on me. Radiate yourself within me.
Help me Jesus. Help me to be that man.
Day and Night (Nov 13, 2008)
Day and night, I talked to you my God.
Every second, on my knees begging for your smile.
My ways are human, they're all that I know.
I asked for your peace, haven't felt it in awhile.
Day and night, sorrow came crashing in my soul.
Like waves upon the shore, my sandy heart washed away.
Who am I, why am I here, what is my purpose?
The moment of your return my Lord, OH WHAT A DAY!
Day and night, my heart searched to be found.
Every moment, eyes scanning the heavens for a sign.
Your ways are your own, they have no equal.
This gift you've offered, could it really be MINE?
Day and night, eyebrows have entered my mind.
How can I deserve this Lord, this amazing gift.
My face lights up, my heart jumps all around.
In your constant mercy, it is my hope you lift.
Every second, on my knees begging for your smile.
My ways are human, they're all that I know.
I asked for your peace, haven't felt it in awhile.
Day and night, sorrow came crashing in my soul.
Like waves upon the shore, my sandy heart washed away.
Who am I, why am I here, what is my purpose?
The moment of your return my Lord, OH WHAT A DAY!
Day and night, my heart searched to be found.
Every moment, eyes scanning the heavens for a sign.
Your ways are your own, they have no equal.
This gift you've offered, could it really be MINE?
Day and night, eyebrows have entered my mind.
How can I deserve this Lord, this amazing gift.
My face lights up, my heart jumps all around.
In your constant mercy, it is my hope you lift.
New Horizen (Nov 7, 2008)
The sun is rising in the East. How long since I've seen its rays.
A new day is beginning. The one before seems so long ago.
The beating is back, the nervousness returned.
What does God have planned? No one yet knows.
Happiness has returned to my life. I praise you my Savior.
When I was weak, you gave me strength. I was down and you lifted me.
I cried out to you, unclear of your voice. You persisted and stayed at my side.
All that you give me, I do not deserve. My life is yours, I give it all to Thee.
The days seem much brighter. The nights more beautiful.
The people more friendly. Enemies are harder to find.
My insides flutter at the thought. How could it be?
My body quivers. You're always on my mind.
A new day is beginning. The one before seems so long ago.
The beating is back, the nervousness returned.
What does God have planned? No one yet knows.
Happiness has returned to my life. I praise you my Savior.
When I was weak, you gave me strength. I was down and you lifted me.
I cried out to you, unclear of your voice. You persisted and stayed at my side.
All that you give me, I do not deserve. My life is yours, I give it all to Thee.
The days seem much brighter. The nights more beautiful.
The people more friendly. Enemies are harder to find.
My insides flutter at the thought. How could it be?
My body quivers. You're always on my mind.
Thought Of Your Name (Sept 7, 2008)
Hopeful, I trusted your words...hoping it would help as you said.
The days have come and gone, but the days still stay the same.
The sun still rises. The sun still sets. The moon still shines among the stars.
My heart still pounds. My hopes still soar. My heart still breaks at the thought of your name.
Sadly, I do the things I know you'd love to see me do, if only I wasn't so late.
I'm completely different from the guy I was. Yet, completely the same.
A lot of things have changed in my life. A lot of things have changed.
But my heart still pounds. My hopes still soar. My heart still breaks at the thought of your name.
I still pray for you every single night. I trust in God, and in God alone.
Friends we began. Love was soon found. Best Friends we became.
Where is it all now? What have I lost? What have I gained?
Well, my heart still pounds. My hopes still soar. My heart still breaks at the thought of your name.
God didn't disappoint me; you did.
The days have come and gone, but the days still stay the same.
The sun still rises. The sun still sets. The moon still shines among the stars.
My heart still pounds. My hopes still soar. My heart still breaks at the thought of your name.
Sadly, I do the things I know you'd love to see me do, if only I wasn't so late.
I'm completely different from the guy I was. Yet, completely the same.
A lot of things have changed in my life. A lot of things have changed.
But my heart still pounds. My hopes still soar. My heart still breaks at the thought of your name.
I still pray for you every single night. I trust in God, and in God alone.
Friends we began. Love was soon found. Best Friends we became.
Where is it all now? What have I lost? What have I gained?
Well, my heart still pounds. My hopes still soar. My heart still breaks at the thought of your name.
God didn't disappoint me; you did.
My Heart Is Fully Empty (Aug 19, 2008)
Misery surrounds me each and everyday.
Pain fills my heart.
Even good memories bring sadness to my life.
Sadness because we're apart.
Hope escapes my grasp, though I continue to reach.
Strength is a stranger that I do not know.
Your face is always on my mind, I can't get away.
I try to hide my pain, I don't want it to show.
To no avail, as my weakness shines bright.
How sad I must look in your mind.
Like a pathetic being with no hope.
It's no wonder you don't feel I'm the greatest find.
I put all that I am, in the hope of our love.
Confident my love would make it through.
Now it's almost gone, my heart shattering away.
But no matter what, I will always LOVE YOU!
Pain fills my heart.
Even good memories bring sadness to my life.
Sadness because we're apart.
Hope escapes my grasp, though I continue to reach.
Strength is a stranger that I do not know.
Your face is always on my mind, I can't get away.
I try to hide my pain, I don't want it to show.
To no avail, as my weakness shines bright.
How sad I must look in your mind.
Like a pathetic being with no hope.
It's no wonder you don't feel I'm the greatest find.
I put all that I am, in the hope of our love.
Confident my love would make it through.
Now it's almost gone, my heart shattering away.
But no matter what, I will always LOVE YOU!
My Heart, Broken and Shattered (July 27, 2008)
How can I explain this feeling? How do I convince you I'm sincere?
Why did you give up on me? Why did you lose trust in me?
Was I that horrible to you? Did I treat you that badly?
Can I really deserve this pain ? Who will be there when I can't breathe?
How can I trust anyone again? Will my heart ever be restored?
If you treat me like this, what will stop all others? Do you know?
You were the one. You were my future and my dream.
You were my happiness. You brought me joy and contentment.
You were ever watchful. You protected me from myself and Balial.
You were our foundation. You made to lift me up whenever I fell.
You were my strength. You knew when to say no, when too concede.
You were my passion. You burned inside me and took my breath.
I don't know if I am strong, I don't know whether I'll finish the race.
I search to find your love, what can I do to gain it back?
I will climb a mountain for you, or swim the endless seas.
I'd fight a million battles, I would defeat the mightiest foes.
I'd do all of this and more you see. To gain your love again for me.
To feel your hands touch my face. Your hair caressing my hands.
Without you my life is void. Empty as a black night.
Without you my strength fails me. Weak as a newborn child.
Without you my dreams torment. Horrifying images of being abandoned.
Without you my heart won't love. Resentment surrounds me.
Without you my hopes are destroyed. Hopeless and alone.
Without you I feel lost. Scared I will not be rescued.
In God my life is whole. Complete in His unending love.
In God my strength is returned. He fights along side me.
In God my dreams abound in joy. Glorifying His name forever.
In God my hearts love is abounding. Praising the Creator of all.
In God my hopes are replenished. Full and rejuvenating.
In God I am found. His arms are all around me.
IN GOD I WILL LOVE YOU. EVERLASTING AND PURE IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL CHERISH YOU. EVERLASTING AND TRUE IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL RESPECT YOU. EVERLASTING AND RIGHT IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL HONOR YOU. EVERLASTING AND RIGHTEOUS IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL ABIDE YOU. EVERLASTING AND HOLY IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL LOVE YOU. EVERLASTING AND PURE IS HE.
Why did you give up on me? Why did you lose trust in me?
Was I that horrible to you? Did I treat you that badly?
Can I really deserve this pain ? Who will be there when I can't breathe?
How can I trust anyone again? Will my heart ever be restored?
If you treat me like this, what will stop all others? Do you know?
You were the one. You were my future and my dream.
You were my happiness. You brought me joy and contentment.
You were ever watchful. You protected me from myself and Balial.
You were our foundation. You made to lift me up whenever I fell.
You were my strength. You knew when to say no, when too concede.
You were my passion. You burned inside me and took my breath.
I don't know if I am strong, I don't know whether I'll finish the race.
I search to find your love, what can I do to gain it back?
I will climb a mountain for you, or swim the endless seas.
I'd fight a million battles, I would defeat the mightiest foes.
I'd do all of this and more you see. To gain your love again for me.
To feel your hands touch my face. Your hair caressing my hands.
Without you my life is void. Empty as a black night.
Without you my strength fails me. Weak as a newborn child.
Without you my dreams torment. Horrifying images of being abandoned.
Without you my heart won't love. Resentment surrounds me.
Without you my hopes are destroyed. Hopeless and alone.
Without you I feel lost. Scared I will not be rescued.
In God my life is whole. Complete in His unending love.
In God my strength is returned. He fights along side me.
In God my dreams abound in joy. Glorifying His name forever.
In God my hearts love is abounding. Praising the Creator of all.
In God my hopes are replenished. Full and rejuvenating.
In God I am found. His arms are all around me.
IN GOD I WILL LOVE YOU. EVERLASTING AND PURE IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL CHERISH YOU. EVERLASTING AND TRUE IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL RESPECT YOU. EVERLASTING AND RIGHT IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL HONOR YOU. EVERLASTING AND RIGHTEOUS IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL ABIDE YOU. EVERLASTING AND HOLY IS HE.
IN GOD I WILL LOVE YOU. EVERLASTING AND PURE IS HE.
Hold Me in Your Arms Papa (July 27, 2008)
What is this feeling I have? What is this cloud over my head?
Is it Your love, or is it my doubt? Longing for your love, oh! to be freed.
My soul is an empty shell, hopelessly searching to be filled.
Hear my cry Father, fill my soul. Love me Papa, that is my need.
My heart is falling, falling, falling. How deep is my sorrow? Only you know.
Fall with me Elousia, be my comfort. My Lord do not abandon your lamb.
Torment is my new friend, sadness my closest companion.
Be my refuge my God. Hold me and Cradle my tears like a dam.
Your love, greater than the oceans, mercy more infinite than the stars.
Jesus, why do I fall? What will you show me, when again I stand?
You work all things for good, no evil is in vain. Yet, what good do I see?
Help me El Shadai, help me to see. See that my life is in your hands.
This hurt I cannot endure alone. This pain is too strong for my spirit.
My life regrets fly through my mind. Despair sets in, I can't resit!
Will you reject me my Lord? What hope do I have to keep the faith?
Endure with me my King. Heal my broken heart my God, let me persist!
Is it Your love, or is it my doubt? Longing for your love, oh! to be freed.
My soul is an empty shell, hopelessly searching to be filled.
Hear my cry Father, fill my soul. Love me Papa, that is my need.
My heart is falling, falling, falling. How deep is my sorrow? Only you know.
Fall with me Elousia, be my comfort. My Lord do not abandon your lamb.
Torment is my new friend, sadness my closest companion.
Be my refuge my God. Hold me and Cradle my tears like a dam.
Your love, greater than the oceans, mercy more infinite than the stars.
Jesus, why do I fall? What will you show me, when again I stand?
You work all things for good, no evil is in vain. Yet, what good do I see?
Help me El Shadai, help me to see. See that my life is in your hands.
This hurt I cannot endure alone. This pain is too strong for my spirit.
My life regrets fly through my mind. Despair sets in, I can't resit!
Will you reject me my Lord? What hope do I have to keep the faith?
Endure with me my King. Heal my broken heart my God, let me persist!
You are My Sun (Jan 23, 2008)
High above I sit, thoughts only of you;
Praying to see you before this day is through.
Pain I've caused, doubts I've raised;
I've destroyed trust from many many days.
Why I did it, the reasons behind it are unknown;
My actions in the past are not condoned.
Though don't give up, no do not despair;
If there is one thing I know, I'll always be there.
One good from this bad, let me tell you;
I love you more than ever, that much is true.
If I am the earth, then you are my sun;
If I can't have you, then I want none.
We may not have a lot, but we don't need much.
All I need to get through the days is your gentle touch.
As long as I have you, I am complete as can be;
I Give All that I am...Is It Enough (July 17, 2007
Starring at the bright light again;
Everyday, it's all the same.
Starring blankly, thoughts swimming;
We should've been told, it's all a game.
It doesn't matter what we do;
No one cares.
The moment we're stranded;
Is anyone gonna be there?
We live a good life, who notices;
Freaks is what they call us.
Our reward is not of this world we're told;
Then take me out of it!
If it makes you less sad;
I'd do anything
If it makes you less sad;
I'd buy another ring
Why do the good get stepped on;
Yet, the evil are blessed?
One week, it's all I asked;
Denied
I lived my life for something good;
Where did it go
Is there nothing good to live for;
Let me know
Hypocrytes - all of you;
How dare you call yourselves a lamb!
Likes snakes you are;
Liers, deceivers, hypocrytes
How can I lead my own sheep;
I'm not worthy.
How can I guide them;
I am still lost
Is this my soul, or just an empty heart?
I'll never forget what you took away.
How could you leave us like that;
When you took him that day
This is it, I've had enough;
I'm tired of putting in my all, my everything.
Who cares what they think, I am who I am;
I'm done
Everyday, it's all the same.
Starring blankly, thoughts swimming;
We should've been told, it's all a game.
It doesn't matter what we do;
No one cares.
The moment we're stranded;
Is anyone gonna be there?
We live a good life, who notices;
Freaks is what they call us.
Our reward is not of this world we're told;
Then take me out of it!
If it makes you less sad;
I'd do anything
If it makes you less sad;
I'd buy another ring
Why do the good get stepped on;
Yet, the evil are blessed?
One week, it's all I asked;
Denied
I lived my life for something good;
Where did it go
Is there nothing good to live for;
Let me know
Hypocrytes - all of you;
How dare you call yourselves a lamb!
Likes snakes you are;
Liers, deceivers, hypocrytes
How can I lead my own sheep;
I'm not worthy.
How can I guide them;
I am still lost
Is this my soul, or just an empty heart?
I'll never forget what you took away.
How could you leave us like that;
When you took him that day
This is it, I've had enough;
I'm tired of putting in my all, my everything.
Who cares what they think, I am who I am;
I'm done
All I Can Give (June 13, 2006)
i am sorry that i can't give you that much;
all i can give you is my heart.
maybe later i'll have more to give;
but this is all i have to start.
i look at other guys, and they've been given so much more;
money, cars, schooling, you name it they got it.
sometimes i think of it too much and i get upset;
but then i think, "they don't have you - so they don't have shit!
the ring on your finger is small and plain;
but the heart that i give is bigger than the world.
what if things don't happen like we hoped;
no worldly possesions, just each other to hold.
would we be off that bad? would you regret being with me?
who knows if i'll ever play professional ball.
i know i know, i need to stay positive right?
sometimes its hard at 5'10 when everyone else is over 6 feet tall.
imagine our lives if we'd grown up differently;
parents were rich, lacked nothing that we desired.
I could've bought you a nice ring, we could get married!
back to reality now, why is it so hard for me to get hired.
its getting late now and my head's starting to spin;
got wake up in the morning and start another day.
whats the point of pursuing something that is never going to happen?
they don't want me, i'm not good enough for them no matter how much i want to play.
you're too small they say, sorry can't help that;
you don't throw fast enough, again something i can't really fix.
everything else is great they say, we love how you throw;
just give it to me straight stop pulling your kicks!
if you're going to tell me no then tell me NO;
don't keep filling my head with these false hopes.
just keep doing what your doing, you're doing great;
what do you take me for? I'm not just another dope.
enough about that, cause i could go on all night;
but its now time for sleep;
its probably for the best, since you probably don't care anyways;
i just hope this is one of those poems to keep.
all i can give you is my heart.
maybe later i'll have more to give;
but this is all i have to start.
i look at other guys, and they've been given so much more;
money, cars, schooling, you name it they got it.
sometimes i think of it too much and i get upset;
but then i think, "they don't have you - so they don't have shit!
the ring on your finger is small and plain;
but the heart that i give is bigger than the world.
what if things don't happen like we hoped;
no worldly possesions, just each other to hold.
would we be off that bad? would you regret being with me?
who knows if i'll ever play professional ball.
i know i know, i need to stay positive right?
sometimes its hard at 5'10 when everyone else is over 6 feet tall.
imagine our lives if we'd grown up differently;
parents were rich, lacked nothing that we desired.
I could've bought you a nice ring, we could get married!
back to reality now, why is it so hard for me to get hired.
its getting late now and my head's starting to spin;
got wake up in the morning and start another day.
whats the point of pursuing something that is never going to happen?
they don't want me, i'm not good enough for them no matter how much i want to play.
you're too small they say, sorry can't help that;
you don't throw fast enough, again something i can't really fix.
everything else is great they say, we love how you throw;
just give it to me straight stop pulling your kicks!
if you're going to tell me no then tell me NO;
don't keep filling my head with these false hopes.
just keep doing what your doing, you're doing great;
what do you take me for? I'm not just another dope.
enough about that, cause i could go on all night;
but its now time for sleep;
its probably for the best, since you probably don't care anyways;
i just hope this is one of those poems to keep.
By Their Love (April 20, 2006
In the back of my mind, I see you clearly;
Yet, the thoughts in my head fade out.
In the back of my mind, I love you dearly;
Yet, the thoughts in my head show doubt.
My mind wanders with hopes of something better;
Hard times encourage me to lose hope.
My mind wanders, which is why I write this letter;
Hard times bring out the ones to help me cope.
My dreams have been set at a place hard to reach;
If not for her, I'd have lost hope long ago;
My dream will take time, I must stick to it like a leech;
If not for her, I would never be able to make it to the show.
She brings me up, able to reach higher places;
If my spirit's been crushed, He lifts me up.
She brings me up so I can explore new spaces;
If my spirit's been beaten, He refills my cup.
By His grace, I have a life worth boasting;
From her belief, I have the courage to keep trying.
By His grace, it is a life meant for toasting;
From her belief, I feel as if I am flying.
By His love I live everyday in hopes of pleasing Him;
By her love I hope to one day prove I deserve her.
By His love I am a new person, walking amongst men;
By her love I am walking strong, as she was my cure.
Yet, the thoughts in my head fade out.
In the back of my mind, I love you dearly;
Yet, the thoughts in my head show doubt.
My mind wanders with hopes of something better;
Hard times encourage me to lose hope.
My mind wanders, which is why I write this letter;
Hard times bring out the ones to help me cope.
My dreams have been set at a place hard to reach;
If not for her, I'd have lost hope long ago;
My dream will take time, I must stick to it like a leech;
If not for her, I would never be able to make it to the show.
She brings me up, able to reach higher places;
If my spirit's been crushed, He lifts me up.
She brings me up so I can explore new spaces;
If my spirit's been beaten, He refills my cup.
By His grace, I have a life worth boasting;
From her belief, I have the courage to keep trying.
By His grace, it is a life meant for toasting;
From her belief, I feel as if I am flying.
By His love I live everyday in hopes of pleasing Him;
By her love I hope to one day prove I deserve her.
By His love I am a new person, walking amongst men;
By her love I am walking strong, as she was my cure.
Memories for Yesterday (Sept 29, 2005
Endless nights, where do the days go;
Time flies by us quickly, thats for sho'.
The days seem so long, the nights so short;
Memories surround, like when i took you to court.
Yesterday is filled with thoughts of the past;
For all of eternity, these memories will last.
Late in the morning, we're still at it all;
I know almost to the minute, when you will call.
You are the greatest thing, to come to my life;
It's really happening Tacha, you will be my WIFE.
These thoughts in my head, they will not go;
Comfort me everyday, this you should know.
I thought it'd get easier, to be away for this time;
Weeks and weeks go by, and you'll always be mine.
But the longer time go goes, the harder it feels;
To be away from you baby, this love that is so real.
Can't go much longer, cause I miss you to much;
Cause it strains my heart, talking about such.
It's not that I mind, or that I want to stop;
But it hurts me to know that with me you're not.
We must be strong, cause it will get harder;
Times when our love will want to go further.
A promise we have made, a promise we will keep;
I cannot wait till I can again rub your feet.
The time has come, to send this to you;
Won't read it till tomorrow, it'll still hold true.
Goodnight my love, my dreams tonight you'll bless;
Giving me the best, cause it's true love's true rest.
Time flies by us quickly, thats for sho'.
The days seem so long, the nights so short;
Memories surround, like when i took you to court.
Yesterday is filled with thoughts of the past;
For all of eternity, these memories will last.
Late in the morning, we're still at it all;
I know almost to the minute, when you will call.
You are the greatest thing, to come to my life;
It's really happening Tacha, you will be my WIFE.
These thoughts in my head, they will not go;
Comfort me everyday, this you should know.
I thought it'd get easier, to be away for this time;
Weeks and weeks go by, and you'll always be mine.
But the longer time go goes, the harder it feels;
To be away from you baby, this love that is so real.
Can't go much longer, cause I miss you to much;
Cause it strains my heart, talking about such.
It's not that I mind, or that I want to stop;
But it hurts me to know that with me you're not.
We must be strong, cause it will get harder;
Times when our love will want to go further.
A promise we have made, a promise we will keep;
I cannot wait till I can again rub your feet.
The time has come, to send this to you;
Won't read it till tomorrow, it'll still hold true.
Goodnight my love, my dreams tonight you'll bless;
Giving me the best, cause it's true love's true rest.
So Happy (June 23, 2005)
So happy am I, that I have you;
Greatest in all the world, that much is true.
So sorry am I, that I put you through this;
I am with you now, you’ll never lose this kiss.
I was blind for a time, but now I do see;
Never truly loved another, you’re all there will be.
Marry you I will, someday that will come;
So happy I am, it makes my body go numb.
In the stands you sit, watching me play;
Chad Wilhoite’s wife, is what the TV will say.
All the men will be jealous, wishing they’re me;
Just cause I have you, their reasoning will be.
I love you more, than all the chocolate in the world;
Our life together, many stories will be told.
So happy I feel, how could I have someone so great;
God brought us to this, surely now it is our fate.
Greatest in all the world, that much is true.
So sorry am I, that I put you through this;
I am with you now, you’ll never lose this kiss.
I was blind for a time, but now I do see;
Never truly loved another, you’re all there will be.
Marry you I will, someday that will come;
So happy I am, it makes my body go numb.
In the stands you sit, watching me play;
Chad Wilhoite’s wife, is what the TV will say.
All the men will be jealous, wishing they’re me;
Just cause I have you, their reasoning will be.
I love you more, than all the chocolate in the world;
Our life together, many stories will be told.
So happy I feel, how could I have someone so great;
God brought us to this, surely now it is our fate.
Waiting for Her Return (June 14, 2005)
I sit here alone, thinking of her;
She is asleep right now, of this I am sure.
I cannot sleep, for she is ever on my mind;
Cause this girl that I love, is one of a kind.
Happy am I, that a week we won't go;
Of us talking together, so that love may grow.
Hopeful am I, of the day she comes back;
For seeing one another, is something we lack.
I sit here thinking, waiting for her return;
Its only been one day, yet still my heart burns.
This is for you, to read when you come home;
While reading my emails and talking on the phone.
This is the end, its all I have for now;
You are my love, and this is my vow.
I miss you more than ever before;
To dreamland I go, you're the one I adore.
She is asleep right now, of this I am sure.
I cannot sleep, for she is ever on my mind;
Cause this girl that I love, is one of a kind.
Happy am I, that a week we won't go;
Of us talking together, so that love may grow.
Hopeful am I, of the day she comes back;
For seeing one another, is something we lack.
I sit here thinking, waiting for her return;
Its only been one day, yet still my heart burns.
This is for you, to read when you come home;
While reading my emails and talking on the phone.
This is the end, its all I have for now;
You are my love, and this is my vow.
I miss you more than ever before;
To dreamland I go, you're the one I adore.
Holding Your Hand (Mar 23, 2005)
Holding your hand, I can reach new heights;
higher and higher, winning every fight.
Holding your hand, makes me want to try harder;
Whenever I am with you, I know i can go further.
Holding your hand, my life is near complete;
Only your sweet kiss is a greater feat.
Holding your hand, my love breaks out;
No more hiding, no feelings of doubt.
Holding your hand, makes my smile abound;
Like a child at christmas, wanting to jump up and down.
Holding your hand, I worry no more;
My only problem comes at opening the door.
In my arms, i hold you so tight;
the joy that i feel, I could hold you all night.
In my arms, our love is so clear;
I'll be here forever, let us not fear.
higher and higher, winning every fight.
Holding your hand, makes me want to try harder;
Whenever I am with you, I know i can go further.
Holding your hand, my life is near complete;
Only your sweet kiss is a greater feat.
Holding your hand, my love breaks out;
No more hiding, no feelings of doubt.
Holding your hand, makes my smile abound;
Like a child at christmas, wanting to jump up and down.
Holding your hand, I worry no more;
My only problem comes at opening the door.
In my arms, i hold you so tight;
the joy that i feel, I could hold you all night.
In my arms, our love is so clear;
I'll be here forever, let us not fear.
Lonely Night (Mar 19, 2005)
This lonely night, I sit alone;
No eyes are open, except my own.
Not ready to sleep, I’m thinking of you;
I’ll be so happy when this trip is through.
I talked to you, for a very short time;
But short as it was, oh so divine.
You miss me, I miss you more;
Sometimes we act like we are four.
These chills go through, down to my knees;
Brought on by these thoughts, thoughts of thee.
I look at the moon and brightly you so glow;
I love you dearest for all to know.
Here again, another lonely night;
Clouded thoughts, of when I might.
It gets so close, but stays so far away;
Thinking of when, seeing you I may.
Lost without you, what did I do;
To go so far away, so far from you.
Never again, will I go through this;
At least not without true loves first kiss.
All around me, people are with;
the girl of their dreams, with you I wish.
All this time that I am away;
I’ll make up to you one day.
I don’t think I’ll make it through;
Cause all I think about is you.
No eyes are open, except my own.
Not ready to sleep, I’m thinking of you;
I’ll be so happy when this trip is through.
I talked to you, for a very short time;
But short as it was, oh so divine.
You miss me, I miss you more;
Sometimes we act like we are four.
These chills go through, down to my knees;
Brought on by these thoughts, thoughts of thee.
I look at the moon and brightly you so glow;
I love you dearest for all to know.
Here again, another lonely night;
Clouded thoughts, of when I might.
It gets so close, but stays so far away;
Thinking of when, seeing you I may.
Lost without you, what did I do;
To go so far away, so far from you.
Never again, will I go through this;
At least not without true loves first kiss.
All around me, people are with;
the girl of their dreams, with you I wish.
All this time that I am away;
I’ll make up to you one day.
I don’t think I’ll make it through;
Cause all I think about is you.
Miserablely Alone (Mar 19, 2005)
Away from you I am;
I can feel the pain within.
Further I fly, from your loving face;
I long to be with you, to feel your embrace.
Reminded of you, with every thought;
This love for you, will never be forgot.
I love you more, every passing day;
To be with you forever, how hard I do pray.
The magic within, the fire without;
To be without you, I’d die no doubt.
I miss you so much, more than you know;
I cannot stand to be away, my love cannot show.
I lack the ability, to think not of you;
Your face I see, no matter what I do.
High above and far between;
A fantasy of mine, is you as my queen.
Going Crazy going insane;
The only cure is to think of your name.
Madly in love, miserably alone;
To see you one more time, I’d claim you as my own
I can feel the pain within.
Further I fly, from your loving face;
I long to be with you, to feel your embrace.
Reminded of you, with every thought;
This love for you, will never be forgot.
I love you more, every passing day;
To be with you forever, how hard I do pray.
The magic within, the fire without;
To be without you, I’d die no doubt.
I miss you so much, more than you know;
I cannot stand to be away, my love cannot show.
I lack the ability, to think not of you;
Your face I see, no matter what I do.
High above and far between;
A fantasy of mine, is you as my queen.
Going Crazy going insane;
The only cure is to think of your name.
Madly in love, miserably alone;
To see you one more time, I’d claim you as my own
Forbidden Night (Feb 20, 2005)
The day was cold, as I sat alone;
These endless nights, were dreaming is prone.
I’ll never know whether it was right;
las its come, this Forbidden Night.
Know by all, foreseen by none;
This Forbidden Night, the time has come.
The Queen of the home, against it she stands;
Commanding and demanding, while shaking her hands.
This damsel of mine, distress may not be;
Fighting for freedom, against all who see.
Fighting on till the end, does the valiant knight;
Hold your breath as you watch, this Forbidden Night!
These endless nights, were dreaming is prone.
I’ll never know whether it was right;
las its come, this Forbidden Night.
Know by all, foreseen by none;
This Forbidden Night, the time has come.
The Queen of the home, against it she stands;
Commanding and demanding, while shaking her hands.
This damsel of mine, distress may not be;
Fighting for freedom, against all who see.
Fighting on till the end, does the valiant knight;
Hold your breath as you watch, this Forbidden Night!
Room Full of Names (Feb 20, 2005)
I think alone in this room of names;
I remember all the times of fun and games.
I look around and wish I’d see;
Someone special, very special to me.
I sit and wait, as a few come in;
But none of these I’d call a friend.
I hear the songs, and the banging of feet;
And think of all sounds of people I'd meet.
Not many are true, or dear to my heart;
But the few who are, are a real work of art.
I cannot look up, or scarred will I be;
All these people around, what do they think of me.
The time passes by, and still I don’t see;
With her always, why can’t I be.
I don’t hear a thing, no not a sound;
All I hear is her voice when she’s not around.
Why is it that I, can’t think of another;
I even think of her while talking to her mother.
Some say its so sweet, its true at first;
But the longer I go, its more of a curse.
The days are long, and the nights are short;
As long as I think of this girl to court.
Patient am I, as I wait for the day;
Waiting, oh waiting, to find a way.
I remember all the times of fun and games.
I look around and wish I’d see;
Someone special, very special to me.
I sit and wait, as a few come in;
But none of these I’d call a friend.
I hear the songs, and the banging of feet;
And think of all sounds of people I'd meet.
Not many are true, or dear to my heart;
But the few who are, are a real work of art.
I cannot look up, or scarred will I be;
All these people around, what do they think of me.
The time passes by, and still I don’t see;
With her always, why can’t I be.
I don’t hear a thing, no not a sound;
All I hear is her voice when she’s not around.
Why is it that I, can’t think of another;
I even think of her while talking to her mother.
Some say its so sweet, its true at first;
But the longer I go, its more of a curse.
The days are long, and the nights are short;
As long as I think of this girl to court.
Patient am I, as I wait for the day;
Waiting, oh waiting, to find a way.
Light of My Life (Feb 20, 2005)
A moment passed and we didn’t show;
That our lives were changed, for all to know.
When I think of you, the world ceases to exist;
Your face so stunning, I cannot resist.
Passing the minutes, passing the time;
From this moment on, you will be mine.
Your hair so smooth, and skin so soft;
Stunned by your touch, my heart sours aloft.
You rested in me, put your heart in my hands;
Hoping and praying we’ll be more than just friends.
I want to give you, all that I am;
I want to change for you, I know I can.
Away from you, I cannot be;
To be by you forever is my plea.
You change the way, I see the world;
Endless nights, of things untold.
The flames burn, within your eyes;
Yet they never cease to turn my body to ice.
Frozen by you, Burning for you;
Seized by your everlasting beauty.
Around you I feel I can fly;
The twinkle in your eyes make me sigh.
I can’t remove, your face from my mind;
Angel of mine, you’re my sunshine!
That our lives were changed, for all to know.
When I think of you, the world ceases to exist;
Your face so stunning, I cannot resist.
Passing the minutes, passing the time;
From this moment on, you will be mine.
Your hair so smooth, and skin so soft;
Stunned by your touch, my heart sours aloft.
You rested in me, put your heart in my hands;
Hoping and praying we’ll be more than just friends.
I want to give you, all that I am;
I want to change for you, I know I can.
Away from you, I cannot be;
To be by you forever is my plea.
You change the way, I see the world;
Endless nights, of things untold.
The flames burn, within your eyes;
Yet they never cease to turn my body to ice.
Frozen by you, Burning for you;
Seized by your everlasting beauty.
Around you I feel I can fly;
The twinkle in your eyes make me sigh.
I can’t remove, your face from my mind;
Angel of mine, you’re my sunshine!
Upon the Hill (Feb 20, 2005)
Perched upon the hill so battered, In armor worn, torn and shattered.
Atop this hill, he rests alone, Kneeling down, his body prone.
A pool of blood surrounds his feet, Reflecting clouds, snow and sleet.
His broadsword bathed in fearless red, Telling tales of men now dead.
He sheds one tear, for men he knew, Men he loved, the boldest few.
As weakness climbs upon his back, This warrior hurt, about to crack.
He mutters soft, an ancient prayer. His lips are forming words with care.
An unknown force warms his heart, Giving him a will to start.
His sword now turned from ruthless pain To something meager, a simple cane.
He rights himself and takes a stride, Nursing his now broken pride.
Our hero makes his way alone, Stumbling on his long walk home.
Atop this hill, he rests alone, Kneeling down, his body prone.
A pool of blood surrounds his feet, Reflecting clouds, snow and sleet.
His broadsword bathed in fearless red, Telling tales of men now dead.
He sheds one tear, for men he knew, Men he loved, the boldest few.
As weakness climbs upon his back, This warrior hurt, about to crack.
He mutters soft, an ancient prayer. His lips are forming words with care.
An unknown force warms his heart, Giving him a will to start.
His sword now turned from ruthless pain To something meager, a simple cane.
He rights himself and takes a stride, Nursing his now broken pride.
Our hero makes his way alone, Stumbling on his long walk home.
The Hill Cries Out (Feb 12, 2005)
Flash, flash, flash, the rain cries out;
Holding their secrets of pain and doubt.
They keep it hidden till the end;
When at that time, their death begins.
The hill speaks and asks of you;
What happens when the rain is through.
Standing there atop this hill;
To be here forever is your will.
Why oh! Why, the hill cries out;
Your happiness with me is one I doubt.
Rarely is one, so honest and true;
But this I must say, for I love you.
For you I know, are rare indeed;
A first in my life, is a man that I need.
Not much I wanted, in life to receive;
But to lose you now, I'd end my life with ease.
This I say is the honest truth;
Of the truest love, this young girl can prove.
This battered hill, that none could perceive;
Stood up brightly for all the world to see.
Holding their secrets of pain and doubt.
They keep it hidden till the end;
When at that time, their death begins.
The hill speaks and asks of you;
What happens when the rain is through.
Standing there atop this hill;
To be here forever is your will.
Why oh! Why, the hill cries out;
Your happiness with me is one I doubt.
Rarely is one, so honest and true;
But this I must say, for I love you.
For you I know, are rare indeed;
A first in my life, is a man that I need.
Not much I wanted, in life to receive;
But to lose you now, I'd end my life with ease.
This I say is the honest truth;
Of the truest love, this young girl can prove.
This battered hill, that none could perceive;
Stood up brightly for all the world to see.
Eternal Love (Feb 12, 2005)
Your hair so smooth, and skin so soft;
Stunned by your touch, my heart sours aloft.
Passing the minutes, passing the time;
From this moment on, you will be mine.
Gently I placed, your heart to mine;
This feeling I have, oh, so divine.
You change the way, I see the world;
Endless nights, of things untold.
I held you close, and held you tight;
I looked in your eyes, and found your light.
As the sun came up, we watched as one;
Knowing our relationship has just begun.
You stare at me, my body goes weak;
You closed your eyes, I kissed your cheek.
I cannot resist, this force that leads me;
Drawn to your lips, your gaze I'm holding.
It was three A.M., when I woke you up;
We talked of our lives, as the sun came up.
All I want is one more day;
For that I'd give it all away.
Stunned by your touch, my heart sours aloft.
Passing the minutes, passing the time;
From this moment on, you will be mine.
Gently I placed, your heart to mine;
This feeling I have, oh, so divine.
You change the way, I see the world;
Endless nights, of things untold.
I held you close, and held you tight;
I looked in your eyes, and found your light.
As the sun came up, we watched as one;
Knowing our relationship has just begun.
You stare at me, my body goes weak;
You closed your eyes, I kissed your cheek.
I cannot resist, this force that leads me;
Drawn to your lips, your gaze I'm holding.
It was three A.M., when I woke you up;
We talked of our lives, as the sun came up.
All I want is one more day;
For that I'd give it all away.
In the Rain (Feb 12, 2005)
Standing atop this hill, the rain flying down;
The sparkle in your eyes, not a hint of a frown.
The moonlight shines, and through it rays it shows; That in this darkness, a million diamonds are aglow.
Not in this lifetime, or billions to come; Your beauty this night will be compared to none.
Like the silent rose bush, or solemn willow tree;
Your radiance will set the fiercest heart free.
Raindrops gleam off the flower that is you;
Never knowing they fell on something so true.
Dreams of old begin to come alive; Things you never new find a way to thrive.
Flash, flash, flash, the rain cries out; Holding their secrets of pain and doubt.
They keep it hidden till the end;
When at that time, their death begins.
The hill speaks and asks of you;
What happens when the rain is through.
Standing there atop this hill;
To be here forever is your will.
The sparkle in your eyes, not a hint of a frown.
The moonlight shines, and through it rays it shows; That in this darkness, a million diamonds are aglow.
Not in this lifetime, or billions to come; Your beauty this night will be compared to none.
Like the silent rose bush, or solemn willow tree;
Your radiance will set the fiercest heart free.
Raindrops gleam off the flower that is you;
Never knowing they fell on something so true.
Dreams of old begin to come alive; Things you never new find a way to thrive.
Flash, flash, flash, the rain cries out; Holding their secrets of pain and doubt.
They keep it hidden till the end;
When at that time, their death begins.
The hill speaks and asks of you;
What happens when the rain is through.
Standing there atop this hill;
To be here forever is your will.
What This Blog Entails
So I decided that I would create a place that holds all the poems I've written over the years. Some of them were years ago, while some have been more recent. Some are very cheesy, while some of pretty good. Some are about girls, some are about life, and some are about God. Regardless, I hope that you enjoy them.
(The Blogs dated Feb 12 2005 & Feb 20 2005 were not all in fact written on those days. That is just the date I posted them all on my myspace blog. Most of them were probably written a year or so earlier.)
(The Blogs dated Feb 12 2005 & Feb 20 2005 were not all in fact written on those days. That is just the date I posted them all on my myspace blog. Most of them were probably written a year or so earlier.)
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